We've been looking at intellectual growth this week during my series, Confident in God's Hands. Today, I'd like to address the importance of perfecting the skills we have learned.
Don't waste your time on education.
We often get excited about learning something new, so we sign up for a class. For the first days or weeks, we are highly motivated, and we try our best to understand all that is new. This is because learning a new skill gives us a rush, as would a new relationship, a new adventure, or a new addiction.
Then, the newness wears off, and our interest begins to fade. We discover that it's hard to learn, and many of us give up shortly after our high-energy beginnings. We quickly come to regret the time and money we've expended on our dream. When we quickly give up, we've wasted our our time on education.
Dedicate yourself to success.
Learning requires discpline, perseverance, and the ability to keep our eyes focused on the end goal. If we want to learn to play the piano, for example, we must start by imagining ourselves successfully playing. Then, we have to sign up for lessons and practice, practice, practice.
I began taking piano lessons when I was four years old. It was my mother's idea, so my motivation to practice was not very strong. For a number of years, I took lessons, but I rarely touched the keys when my teacher wasn't around. Others told me that my goal should be to memorize a piece to play in a recital. I really preferred playing outside to practicing. Their dream was not mine.
And then something changed. I discovered a type of music known as boogie-woogie, and my level of interest shot upward. There was something about the syncopated rhythms and bouncy melodies that motivated me to get it right. I began practicing without worrying about how much time I spent at he keyboard. Suddenly, I had a dream. I wanted to play this music for others, so that they could feel the joy that I did through the tunes.
After a number of years, I discovered that I was spending all of my free time at the piano. At one point, I was playing four hours a day. I began signing up for competitions and easily won a number of prizes and medals. When we devote that much time to any one pursuit, it stands to reason that we'll improve.
Find a mentor to achieve a break-through.
Eventually, we'll hit a plateau in our learning. We'll reach a point where further growth can only come with new input. For me, it meant finding a professor at a local university who taught me how to play jazz improvization.
The early years of studying boring piano theory, practicing scales, and pulling out my hair over the classics finally paid off. I had the basic knowledge to understand how to write and play my own music. Suddenly, I achieved a break-through. I found myself jamming with a group of jazz musicians, shifting with ease from one chord progression to the next.
I was no longer anxious about the curve of my fingers on the keys, the phrasing, or hitting a wrong note in a well-recognized tune. Jazz improv was freeing, and I felt as if my soul, the music, and the other musicians were all one being. Nothing boosts our confidence like achieving more than we have dreamed was possible.
God wants us to dream and take action.
When God puts a dream in our hearts, he wants us to focus on it and see it through his eyes. Philippians 4:8 (NIV) reminds us, Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.
When we imagine outcomes that are excellent, we've taken the first step in achieving our dreams. But our dreams must be accompanied by actions if we want to achieve success and build confidence.
While I could imagine myself playing in a recital, I was never going to see it become a reality unless I applied myself to learning how to play the piano. It took teachers, lessons, grueling hours of practice, listening to music, reaching out to other musicians, and the ability to think outside the box to truly excel.
James 1:12 (NIV) tells about the importance of sticking with something to the very end: Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him. James was talking about persevering in holding fast to our faith so that we can find our way to heaven, even when others try to tell us that we're wrong, crazy, or stupid.
But James' words can also be applied to any dream that God puts in our hearts. We must believe in our dreams, believe in the God who placed them in our souls, and believe in our ability to succeed. Adding sustained action to our dreams will inevitably help us to achieve what we want. And increased confidence inevitably follows on the heels of success.
Today's Challenge
Do you have a dream that you've never fulfilled? Did you give up when your interest waned or when the road became too difficult for you? Perhaps you gave up, because you realized the dream was not a part of God's plan for you. It's okay to let go when you've understood that you went the wrong way. Look back over your life and try to see where you have succeeded because you persevered. Can you apply that same persistence to learn something difficult and fulfill your God-driven dreams?
Showing posts with label building confidence. Show all posts
Showing posts with label building confidence. Show all posts
Friday, July 22, 2011
Thursday, July 7, 2011
Express Your True Personality
We are learning how to improve our self-esteem through my series, Confident in God's Hands. Today, I would like to address the importance of expressing our true personalities.
Who do you say you are?
I believe that there are two ways for us to express our true personalities without ever opening our mouths. The first way lies in the way we dress, and the second in the way we structure our environments at home and at work. Today, we'll take a look at clothing styles, and tomorrow, we'll think about what our homes and offices tells others about us.
Who do your clothes say you are?
Our clothing reflects to the world who we believe we are. If we skip the shower and schlep into some holey sweat pants and a dirty t-shirt, we're letting the world know that we're either too tired or too depressed to care about much of anything.
If, as 50-year-olds, we go out into the world wearing mini skirts, 6-inch heels, and low-cut tops, we may be sending the message that we're trying too hard to recapture our youth or we're desperately hoping for a date.
At the opposite extreme, if we don ankle-length denim skirts, long sleeve blouses buttoned up to the throat, along with white Keds sneakers, we're letting the world know that we are highly conservative and extremely modest.
Why do we choose to dress the way we do? Whether we're the couch potato, the siren, or the ultra-conservative doesn't matter, as long as our clothing expresses who we truly are.
Many of us dress as we do, because we believe it's what our culture expects of us. We want to fit in, and we may end up looking like our neighbors or co-workers. The problem is, we may lose our true identities by becoming overly generic.
Dare to be different.
What if we move to a highly conservative town where everyone happens to wear khaki pants and polo shirts? Do we have to conform, or can we be ourselves? If we want to feel confident, I believe we must express who we truly are by choosing to wear whatever we want, as long as it doesn't draw inappropriate attention and isn't an excuse for updating our 1980s wardrobe.
I've mentioned before that where I live, most people see dressing up as putting on a pair of jeans and a clean t-shirt. I can't stand to go out into the world dressed like that, so I dare to be different.
I attended a seminar last weekend, wearing white capri pants and a pretty top. I had accessorized with a long beaded necklace and dangling black earrings. In a room full of people wearing jeans and t-shirts, I stood out from the crowd. Even though I knew nothing more than the rest of the attendees, people kept flocking around me all day to ask me for advice.
Why? I don't think it was because of the clothes, although I believe an attractively dressed woman does draw some attention. No, I think it has a lot more to do with the air of confidence that I exude when I feel good about how I look in those clothes.
People are attracted to others who look confident. It makes them think we're successsful, and they want what we have. And when everyone in the room is hovering around us because we seem like the most courageous person in the room, our confidence really gets a shot in the arm.
The Bible says that the world will follow confident people.
The apostles, Peter and John, were confident in a crowd, not because of their clothing, but because of their complete belief in the message they had to share about Jesus.
Acts 4:13 (MSG) tells us, They [the crowd] couldn't take their eyes off them—Peter and John standing there so confident, so sure of themselves! Their fascination deepened when they realized these two were laymen with no training in Scripture or formal education.
Even though Peter and John were not formally trained in theology, people were fascinated by what they had to say, simply because they exuded so much confidence! People were willing to listen to them and follow them around, just because they were so sure of themselves.
So, if we need to switch out our clothing to find our groove, let's do it! Dressing in a manner that truly expresses who we are gives us the confidence to stand out in a crowd.
Today's Challenge
Take some time today to look in a mirror and consider your clothing. Are you dressing to fit in with those around you? Or are you bold enough to dress in a way that expresses who you truly are? If you're looking generic, go shopping and try on different styles of clothing. Figure out which outfit expresses the true you and take it home. Take note when you wear your new clothing whether or not it boosts your confidence.
Who do you say you are?
I believe that there are two ways for us to express our true personalities without ever opening our mouths. The first way lies in the way we dress, and the second in the way we structure our environments at home and at work. Today, we'll take a look at clothing styles, and tomorrow, we'll think about what our homes and offices tells others about us.
Who do your clothes say you are?
Our clothing reflects to the world who we believe we are. If we skip the shower and schlep into some holey sweat pants and a dirty t-shirt, we're letting the world know that we're either too tired or too depressed to care about much of anything.
If, as 50-year-olds, we go out into the world wearing mini skirts, 6-inch heels, and low-cut tops, we may be sending the message that we're trying too hard to recapture our youth or we're desperately hoping for a date.
At the opposite extreme, if we don ankle-length denim skirts, long sleeve blouses buttoned up to the throat, along with white Keds sneakers, we're letting the world know that we are highly conservative and extremely modest.
Why do we choose to dress the way we do? Whether we're the couch potato, the siren, or the ultra-conservative doesn't matter, as long as our clothing expresses who we truly are.
Many of us dress as we do, because we believe it's what our culture expects of us. We want to fit in, and we may end up looking like our neighbors or co-workers. The problem is, we may lose our true identities by becoming overly generic.
Dare to be different.
What if we move to a highly conservative town where everyone happens to wear khaki pants and polo shirts? Do we have to conform, or can we be ourselves? If we want to feel confident, I believe we must express who we truly are by choosing to wear whatever we want, as long as it doesn't draw inappropriate attention and isn't an excuse for updating our 1980s wardrobe.
I've mentioned before that where I live, most people see dressing up as putting on a pair of jeans and a clean t-shirt. I can't stand to go out into the world dressed like that, so I dare to be different.
I attended a seminar last weekend, wearing white capri pants and a pretty top. I had accessorized with a long beaded necklace and dangling black earrings. In a room full of people wearing jeans and t-shirts, I stood out from the crowd. Even though I knew nothing more than the rest of the attendees, people kept flocking around me all day to ask me for advice.
Why? I don't think it was because of the clothes, although I believe an attractively dressed woman does draw some attention. No, I think it has a lot more to do with the air of confidence that I exude when I feel good about how I look in those clothes.
People are attracted to others who look confident. It makes them think we're successsful, and they want what we have. And when everyone in the room is hovering around us because we seem like the most courageous person in the room, our confidence really gets a shot in the arm.
The Bible says that the world will follow confident people.
The apostles, Peter and John, were confident in a crowd, not because of their clothing, but because of their complete belief in the message they had to share about Jesus.
Acts 4:13 (MSG) tells us, They [the crowd] couldn't take their eyes off them—Peter and John standing there so confident, so sure of themselves! Their fascination deepened when they realized these two were laymen with no training in Scripture or formal education.
Even though Peter and John were not formally trained in theology, people were fascinated by what they had to say, simply because they exuded so much confidence! People were willing to listen to them and follow them around, just because they were so sure of themselves.
So, if we need to switch out our clothing to find our groove, let's do it! Dressing in a manner that truly expresses who we are gives us the confidence to stand out in a crowd.
Today's Challenge
Take some time today to look in a mirror and consider your clothing. Are you dressing to fit in with those around you? Or are you bold enough to dress in a way that expresses who you truly are? If you're looking generic, go shopping and try on different styles of clothing. Figure out which outfit expresses the true you and take it home. Take note when you wear your new clothing whether or not it boosts your confidence.
Thursday, June 23, 2011
Imagine Your Future
My series, Confident in God's Garden, continues with some thoughts about looking ahead at the future. We've learned that, as survivors of abuse or trauma, we can be some of the most fearful people on the planet.
Through this series, we've taken some steps to change our outward appearance so that we feel a little more courageous...better equipped for the battles ahead. If we truly want to become bolder, though, we must change what's on the inside, too.
Imagine a fairy tale ending.
Fairy tales have always been popular, because they give readers hope. The author typically introduces a young girl, trapped in an unhappy childhood, and creates a marvelous future for her. When she achieves her dreams, the reader feels satisfied and uplifted.
Snow White danced around, singing Someday My Prince Will Come. She understood the importance of keeping her eyes on what could be, not what was. Hope gave her the courage to keep on moving through life, dreaming of a better future. Eventually, her dreams came true with the arrival of her prince.
We must imagine ourselves in the future, confident, happy, and satisfied. Getting there won't be easy, but if we think about where we want to end up, we can figure out what we need along the way.
What are God's dreams for our future?
God's got a definite plan for our future with him in heaven. Way back when he created the world, our final destinies were already in his plans. To get us to our end destination, he has orchestrated our arrival on earth at exactly the right time. He placed us in our families--even the most dysfunctional ones--where we would learn the skills that we would need for our future lives.
God knew that we would mess things up and get sidetracked along the way. He realized that we would need tremendous hope to keep on going in this challenging world. That's why he sent Jesus to die on a cross to keep sin from separating us from him. Because of God's great love for us, our futures are clearly defined.
God sent Jeremiah, a prophet, to give the Israelites an encouraging message. This same promise still holds true for us and for our future. I'll show up and take care of you as I promised and bring you back home. I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for. (Jeremiah 29:11b MSG)
Notice that the final phrase says that God has plans to give us the future that we hope for. So many Christians sit back and say that they're waiting on God to tell them what to do. I think they're wasting a lot of precious time, because they fail to engage their minds to discover their purpose for being here.
God has put desires into our hearts for a reason. Those desires are simply his blueprint for our lives. Anything good that we can imagine, God put there in the first place. Our dreams take us where God wants us to go when we step out with courage and put them into action.
Today's Challenge
Imagine your future self as confident, happy, and satisfied. Write down today what you are doing in your dream. Snow White's specific vision was for a prince to come into her life. What's yours? If you're drawing a blank, pray for God's dreams for your future to become clear to you.
Through this series, we've taken some steps to change our outward appearance so that we feel a little more courageous...better equipped for the battles ahead. If we truly want to become bolder, though, we must change what's on the inside, too.
Imagine a fairy tale ending.
Fairy tales have always been popular, because they give readers hope. The author typically introduces a young girl, trapped in an unhappy childhood, and creates a marvelous future for her. When she achieves her dreams, the reader feels satisfied and uplifted.
Snow White danced around, singing Someday My Prince Will Come. She understood the importance of keeping her eyes on what could be, not what was. Hope gave her the courage to keep on moving through life, dreaming of a better future. Eventually, her dreams came true with the arrival of her prince.
We must imagine ourselves in the future, confident, happy, and satisfied. Getting there won't be easy, but if we think about where we want to end up, we can figure out what we need along the way.
What are God's dreams for our future?
God's got a definite plan for our future with him in heaven. Way back when he created the world, our final destinies were already in his plans. To get us to our end destination, he has orchestrated our arrival on earth at exactly the right time. He placed us in our families--even the most dysfunctional ones--where we would learn the skills that we would need for our future lives.
God knew that we would mess things up and get sidetracked along the way. He realized that we would need tremendous hope to keep on going in this challenging world. That's why he sent Jesus to die on a cross to keep sin from separating us from him. Because of God's great love for us, our futures are clearly defined.
God sent Jeremiah, a prophet, to give the Israelites an encouraging message. This same promise still holds true for us and for our future. I'll show up and take care of you as I promised and bring you back home. I know what I'm doing. I have it all planned out—plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for. (Jeremiah 29:11b MSG)
Notice that the final phrase says that God has plans to give us the future that we hope for. So many Christians sit back and say that they're waiting on God to tell them what to do. I think they're wasting a lot of precious time, because they fail to engage their minds to discover their purpose for being here.
God has put desires into our hearts for a reason. Those desires are simply his blueprint for our lives. Anything good that we can imagine, God put there in the first place. Our dreams take us where God wants us to go when we step out with courage and put them into action.
Today's Challenge
Imagine your future self as confident, happy, and satisfied. Write down today what you are doing in your dream. Snow White's specific vision was for a prince to come into her life. What's yours? If you're drawing a blank, pray for God's dreams for your future to become clear to you.
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Be Prepared to Boost Your Confidence
We are learning how to become more confident people through my series, Confident in God's Hands. These lessons are particularly helpful for readers who have survived abuse or trauma, but they can also be insightful for the rest of the population.
Grandma's Bowling Ball
When I was a kid, I went to stay with my grandmother for a week. One night, she got her bowling ball bag out of the closet and set it beside the door.
"Are we going bowling tonight?" I asked.
"No," Grandma said, "Tomorrow."
Hmm...I had never seen anyone prepare for an event in advance like that. I wondered at the time if it was something that only older people did.
Grandma's night-before preparation intrigued me when I was younger, but it has served as a powerful reminder ever since. She knew the importance of being prepared, which allowed her to sleep soundly, kept her from rushing the following day, prevented her from forgetting to take her ball with her, and helped her to arrive on time at the bowling alley.
God is prepared.
Throughout the Bible, there are numerous references to this practice of being prepared. God models this character trait in many ways, and I particularly like how the apostle, Paul, explained it to the Ephesian church. For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.(Ephesians 2:10 NIV)
God has a plan for each one of us. We were sent to earth so that others might come to know him through our love. He is ready to use those who are prepared so that others may be blessed. Are you ready for whatever opportunities may come your way?
Today's Challenge
Do something before going to bed tonight to prepare for your day tomorrow. Lay out your clothes, make a list of errands you will do, or set out the things you will need to take with you when you leave the house. Be prepared and confident for whatever plans God has in store for you.
Grandma's Bowling Ball
When I was a kid, I went to stay with my grandmother for a week. One night, she got her bowling ball bag out of the closet and set it beside the door.
"Are we going bowling tonight?" I asked.
"No," Grandma said, "Tomorrow."
Hmm...I had never seen anyone prepare for an event in advance like that. I wondered at the time if it was something that only older people did.
Grandma's night-before preparation intrigued me when I was younger, but it has served as a powerful reminder ever since. She knew the importance of being prepared, which allowed her to sleep soundly, kept her from rushing the following day, prevented her from forgetting to take her ball with her, and helped her to arrive on time at the bowling alley.
God is prepared.
Throughout the Bible, there are numerous references to this practice of being prepared. God models this character trait in many ways, and I particularly like how the apostle, Paul, explained it to the Ephesian church. For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do.(Ephesians 2:10 NIV)
God has a plan for each one of us. We were sent to earth so that others might come to know him through our love. He is ready to use those who are prepared so that others may be blessed. Are you ready for whatever opportunities may come your way?
Today's Challenge
Do something before going to bed tonight to prepare for your day tomorrow. Lay out your clothes, make a list of errands you will do, or set out the things you will need to take with you when you leave the house. Be prepared and confident for whatever plans God has in store for you.
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